The Otherside of the Districts
by Christine Writer
Summary: Peeta's POV. Post hijacking; trying to recover. Songfic to "The Otherside" by Tamar Kaprelian. ONESHOT!


Disclaimer: I own nothing. Hunger Games belongs to Suzanne Collins and "The Otherside" belongs to Tamar Kaprelian.

_Thirty heartbeats from the rain  
You're a poet with a stranger's name _

Peeta woke up from a terrible nightmare where he had killed Katniss, and had then responded to someone unseen when they called him by a name not his own.

_'Cause you woke up with a shattered heart  
And the pieces are hard to find  
_

His heart was broken beyond repair, he thought. Most of the pieces belonged with Katniss. Even if he wanted to, he wouldn't be able to get them back.

_In this wasted town  
Where they've broken you down  
And poisoned you with words_

In the Capitol, they had used his passion for Katniss against him and poisoned sweet memories of her.

_Under painted lies  
That you've memorized  
It's a story that no one's heard_

There was a set of stories that he knew by heart. He knew, somehow, that they were lies, fed to him by President Snow. He didn't know the real stories, though. The glossy lies they had substituted for his real memories blocked any others from fighting their way through.

What's wrong with the world we live in  
Where the good and bad collide  
When did you stop believing in a better life

When had Peeta given up on hope for a life with Katniss; a better life than he had now? He was safe from the Capitol, but not from their hijacking.

_How many dreams unanswered  
Before we get it right  
What if it's all forgiven  
When you reach the other side_

He had hoped that all would be corrected once he had made it out of the Capitol and reached District 13.

A traveler on these streets of gold  
You never meant to sell your soul

Peeta now realized that if he hadn't shown his hand and told the world that Katniss and he were expecting a child, they wouldn't have done such a thorough job of driving them apart. He hadn't meant to give them everything they needed to destroy him, but he had.

_But you find yourself rearranged  
Like a prophet going blind_

He felt like his brain was arranged in a different pattern than usual, and he didn't know how to fix it.

Tired of saving yourself  
When there's no one to help

Peeta had fought so hard to save himself and Katniss. When he had let her go in the Arena, he had chosen to save only himself. That knowledge ate at him worse than any lie the Capitol could tell him.

_And you're fighting with both hands tied_

Fighting the psychological warfare team in the Capitol seemed pointless, but Peeta had, even when they had restrained him. He had chafed at his restraints until his wrists were bloody.

_And you're ready to go  
In your heart 'cause you know  
No one cares if you live or die_

Once they had broken him, they told him that Katniss wanted him dead. That she had never loved him, and didn't care if he died.

What's wrong with the world we live in  
Where the good and bad collide  
When did you stop believing in a better life  
How many dreams unanswered  
Before we get it right  
What if it's all forgiven  
When you reach the other side

Peeta wished that it would be forgiven him once he reached District 13. Then he had lost his control and tried to kill Katniss. How could she forgive him after that?

You can swallow your pride but the river is wide  
It returns you to where you've been  
Back to sand on the shore

He dreamed of being on the beach in the arena, where he and Katniss had still been in love.

_Back to Heaven and war  
You're searching for where to begin  
_

Where could he start now? Where could he start over with Katniss? The answer eluded him.

What's wrong with this world we live in  
Why am I here inside

Peeta felt trapped inside his own mind.

_When did you stop believing_

What's wrong with the world we live in  
Where the good and bad collide  
When did you stop believing in a better life  
How many dreams unanswered  
Before we get it right  
What if it's all forgiven  
When you reach the other side

He tried the door leading out from his rehabilitation room, and found it unlocked for once. He tried to remember which direction Katniss had gone before. He eventually found her room. It was the middle of the night, and the guards around her door were asleep. He tried to be as quiet as possible, actually succeeding for the first time.

Peeta entered Katniss's room, and saw her and Johanna sleeping in their beds. Katniss was shaking, curled up in a ball in one corner of her cot. His heart broke all over again for her and he sat near her on the bed. He touched her lightly on the shoulder and she snapped awake. Disoriented by sleep, her first instinct was not to cry for help. It was her normal reaction to finding Peeta by her side. She sat up, and allowed him to hold her. She found refuge in his touch. Then she remembered all that had transpired and tugged away from him. Instead of holding on tighter, like he might have done before the Quarter Quell, he released her instantly. She realized that he meant no harm, and leaned up against him. He returned his arms to being wrapped around her, and everything was returned to normal. Katniss knew that they would be just fine. _  
_


End file.
